Writing off the anxiety...

 

 

I've had our move on my mind a lot lately. It's completely consumed me and I've been dealing with self induced anxiety over it. I know I felt this way too before we moved from Idaho to Oregon but this is a much bigger move. A whole house, 3 cars, 2 kids, 1 dog.

 

I feel like I've thought about it or talked about it non-stop so I'm hoping if I just write everything out on my blog I can let go of my anxiety and just focus on life that is still happening around me.

 

We know our relocation budget and we will get the money for our move in January. We can move at anytime once we get it. Any travel that Chris has to make to Atlanta for work in the mean time will have to come out of our relocation budget. That means we need to really plan on moving sooner then later so our budget doesn't dwindle down so much that we can't afford to move. We are working on a plan and will do what is best for our family and what makes sense financially.

 

I have a lot of anxiety about how I'm feeling about the trip. I'm really, really excited. Of course part of me is sad to move away from my brother and my soon to be sister in law. It will be tough to not be a 7 hour drive away from my Mom. I can't just drive there for a week long trip. A lot more time, planning and money will go into visits. I'm sad to move away from close friends and neighbors. I'm sad that I will miss one of my best friends birth of her new baby boy. I still can't help but to feel excited for this new adventure. I'm really looking forward to our road trip across the United States. I've been across the country as a child but don't remember much. I'm happy I get to experience it as an adult as well. I stress about hurting everyone's feelings because all I can focus on is this move. I stress that friends will feel I'm not sad to leave. It comes in waves. The sadness usually hits at night right before I'm about to fall asleep and I have the most down time to think about what great people we won't be near anymore. I can't focus on the sad though or it will drain me.

 

It took a while for Oregon to feel like home but it is home. It's where our sweet Kellyn was born, where our Claire has celebrated most of her birthdays, and where we welcomed Jake into our family. Oregon is so beautiful and I regret that we didn't explore more of it and I am so thankful for all of the adventures we have had here.

 

So far our goal is to move no later then March. This can and probably will change one way or the other. It's all kind of unpredictable right now. Chris flies to Atlanta for a week in January. We are hoping he can check out some houses one of the days he is there. If not, I am hoping we can make a quick trip together to try to find a place in February so we can hopefully find a home, secure a move in date and we can get everything scheduled for movers.

 

So far from what I've researched, the Atlanta area is beautiful. There are a lot of things to do, places to see, experiences waiting to be experienced. I'm so proud of my husband and all of his accomplishments. I'm so thankful I'm the one who gets to be his partner during his journey through his career and life. Maybe what I feel doesn't compare to how he feels, I'm not really sure. He doesn't say too much about his feelings. He's extremely focused on going above and beyond and providing for our family. He was worked hard for all of this and he amazes me every day!

 

 

Quick Update & Photo Dump!

I'm just going to post up a bunch of photos I've taken and update along the way!

The girls' fairy gardens grew really fast! I made some little houses out of toilet paper rolls and scrapbooking paper that I already had. Super simple! I was happy I had little toadstool paper!

Kellyn wanted to rest with her baby in the hallway one day!

One day Ana's girls had the day off from school so we all met up at Barnes and Noble. I took lots of pictures of books that I thought the girls would like. I bought a couple later when the girls weren't with me for Christmas and requested a lot of them from the library!

Kellyn loves this little house! I'd like to get it for her, I just might forget to actually go back to get it.

Kellyn had fun one morning counting her gems from her fairy garden!

Claire turned her little Bubble Guppies table upside down to make a fort for her and her horse, Sushi....yep, she named her Sushi.

Meet Sushi.

The girls were all dressed and ready for their second Little Villagers class.

Another day they wanted lemonade and popcorn so we could watch a movie. Claire was a helper to got our drinks ready!

We met up with some friends at OMSI last Friday. We got our membership card from Grandpa Dan! The girls had a blast! We love OMSI!

Weighing rocks on a scale!

We did our own little color mixing science experiment! The water moved slowly over the paper towels.

In the morning the water had walked to the middle cup and mixed into green! Claire thought it was so cool.

Before we headed out one morning Kellyn just had to line up all of the Hot Wheels cars! She kept telling us to wait a minute so we wouldn't leave without her.

Claire had her first sleepover at a friends house with Ana and her girls! She was so excited and had a blast. Later the next afternoon we were snuggling in my bed watching tv and she fell asleep for a couple hours! Her face is painted like a kitty! Ana painted all of the girls' faces so cute!

Daddy bought a new drag strip for the cars. They had fun for a while after dinner time racing them all and seeing which car would win.

We made little pilgrim hats. The girls had fun coloring their pages and gluing googly eyes on it. I don't think I've ever heard of googly eyes on pilgrim hats but it's very creative which is all that matters! I asked them if they wanted to try them on and neither one of them did.

Kellyn's has the random eyes, Claire drew a black kitty and glued on eyes for it.

Weeks and weeks ago we had made these and I finally glued little eyes and hung them up. They are supposed to be little sun catchers. Kellyn didn't want eyes on hers and Claire picked red eyes. Evil corn!!

Claire had her second riding lesson last Monday and she loved it again! She was a bit distracted at times but overall she did a great job!! She was dressed in layers and was still cold. She wouldn't let me put her winter coat on her though. She got to trot around in a circle, practice leaning forward to go with a little squeeze on Duchess' sides, saying woah, and backing her up. She got to practice using the reigns a little bit too. I'm so proud of her. This is the only photo I took. I recorded longer videos of her lessons on the video camera! I'll eventually upload them!

On Tuesday we met up with our BFF's Megan and Atreyu at IKEA. Claire and Atreyu went to the free daycare there to play for a bit. Kellyn isn't quite tall enough and not potty trained either so she got to hang out with the Momma's all on her own for a bit.

Wednesday morning was the last morning for the Little Villagers class. The girls got to make little leaf suncatchers to hang in the window and we all brought snacks to share with each other. It was a good time. I wish we had found Village Home sooner so we could have enjoyed all 10 weeks of the term but the last 3 weeks were so fun for the girls!

This morning we drew pictures on the chalkboard wall. Claire dressed herself in her swimsuit and asked to take swimming lessons. I told her we don't have a pool to go to today so we could draw pictures of swimming. I drew her and Kellyn. Claire drew an awesome mermaid!

After lunch time today Claire had the brilliant idea of hopping around in pillow cases. She asked if they could race so we cleared the floor and they raced down the hallway! What a fun way to play inside and burn off energy! I love the way she thinks!!

We made a quick trip to the dollar store this morning for a couple craft supplies. This afternoon or this weekend we are hoping to make some little things to send to the grandparents for Christmas time! We miss them and wish we could spend the holidays with them all!

Cowgirl Claire!!

Claire's first riding lesson was this afternoon. In the past she's tried soccer and ballet/tap but was so shy we didn't continue. I'm ok with that. We're open to helping the girls try all sorts of new things to find what interests them most without forcing them into something they don't like. Claire has been all about horses for months and months now. She pretends to be a horse, she wants horse toys, her favorite stuffed animal is her horse named Rockstar, and she even has an imaginary horse named Butterscotch.

A friend of ours told us about the Sande School of Horsemanship. It's a little bit of a drive for us but not too terrible. It's a beautiful drive anyway so that makes it worthwhile as well. When we started our school year in September I took the girls out there to check out the barn. It was awesome! We watched a couple lessons, walked through to see all of the horses, ducks, chickens and dog too. Claire was in heaven. I emailed them to ask about signing her up for lessons but unfortunately all the spots were filled. She was added to the wait list and we were told that quite a few drop lessons once the cold weather hits. A couple weeks ago we got a call and email to let us know a spot opened so we signed Claire up. We visited last week to watch some more lessons and to get Claire comfortable again.

Today was highly anticipated and Claire was so excited to finally get to have her first riding lesson. We met Teacher Jen and she brought us into the barn to meet Duchess. Teacher Jen went over the safe spots to stand by a horse and the no no areas. She learned what a lead is and we were on our way out for her lesson.

She went right in with her teacher while Kellyn and I went to the watching area. She let her teacher help her the whole time. I can't say enough how proud I am. I know she really loves horses and I was so worried she'd shut down once her teacher started talking to her that she wouldn't follow through with her lesson. We practiced a lot throughout the week about how it might be. We talked about what she would say to Jen if she felt nervous. 

She was adjusting the stirrups to fit her!

She was lead along the outside of the barn. She learned to lean back, heels forward and to say Woah! when she wanted Duchess to stop. She listened really well.

At some parts of her lesson Teacher Jen would have Claire hold her arms straight out to balance or to put her hands on her helmet too. Claire smiled the ENTIRE lesson!

She got to trot around in a circle. Claire was so excited that she got to go a little faster on Duchess.

There was a boy on another horse having a lesson at the same time in the arena. At one point his horse got spooked and moved suddenly. Apparently Claire was watching the boy and happened to yell out woah and Duchess stopped walked right away. She usually says woah or holy cow when something happens but she picked woah and Teacher Jen was so amazed! She said most people wouldn't think to yell out woah when another horse gets spooked. Claire was pretty proud of herself!

After her lesson was over Teacher Jen helped her learn how to get down. Then she was brave enough to help walk Duchess back to the barn.

All smiles!! She was hoping to go for a trail ride this time but maybe next week she will get to go the last few minutes of her lesson. We walked through the barn to see the other horses before we left.

Of course she was excited to see the chickens too that were running through the barn.

I am so proud of Claire. It literally brought tears to my eyes to see her so happy. This may be her thing. We will take it one week at a time! Now all we need to do is buy a helmet, long johns for under clothes, and gloves to keep her warm during her lessons! I'm really looking forward to next Monday!!